To my Father, Best Friend and Hero
Happy 62nd birthday, Dad! The assembled collection of stories and memories from your friends and family shine a light on the incredible person you are and how many lives you’ve touched. While I think it’s important to highlight the incredible man you are today, I want to take a moment to examine the remarkable life you’ve led to become this walking inspiration. Your story is one of an undeterrable underdog, who beat the odds and inspired countless others along the way. You uplift everyone around you and the world is a better place because of you.
6300 Blair Way – Las Vegas, Nevada
You were born into a family poor in material resources but wealthy in love and kinship. Your hard upbringing forged an unbreakable bond between you and your siblings. A solemn creed was born, no one messes with the Lonardo’s. If you fight one Lonardo, you fight them all. This Article-5-of- NATO-like family agreement to consider an attack on one an attack on all, resulted in countless fights, all of which furthered the Family’s enduring resolve to always stand together. A Lonardo never fights alone! With the benefit of hindsight, all your early adversities were nothing more than “desirable difficulties” that trained your resolve and gave you compassion for all who start life at a disadvantage.
Commanding Sentences – Basic English and Grammar
Coming out of High School, you were functionally illiterate and directionless. Your inflection point came when you enrolled part time in Las Vegas Community College. Your first class was “Commanding Sentences, Basic English and Grammer”. You still have this book in your safe, as a memento to your lifelong journey. (See picture). This sub-101 level class was so basic that it didn’t count for any college credit. You truly had to start from the very bottom.
I remember you telling me about this era when I was a little boy. You told me about a bully who worked at the hospital with you, named Pete Blatt, where you were a patient transporter. He misjudged you as stupid and dim-witted. He went as far as to publicly post a poem, mocking you. The poem was aptly titled, “Nick, Nick, Dumb as a stick!”. Tears welled up in my eyes and my little hands balled into fists as I learned of how he tormented you. I later asked you, given that you went on receive a Doctorate degree and became and published academic author, if you’d enjoy running into Pete, so that you could show him how wrong he was. You said you felt no ill will toward him and merely felt bad for him. You thought he must have been going through a struggle of his own to feel the need to try to belittle you. You have always had an enormously compassionate heart.
I for one have never had your forgiving nature. “Who’s stupid now, Pete?!” (just kidding, kind of).
As the first in our Family to graduate from college you blazed the path for all those that have followed in your footsteps. You have spent a lifetime as an evangelist for education. You have often sought out young people, struggling early on their journey, and inspired them with your come from behind story. Your example has inspired many to be brave and push themselves forward to new heights.
Slowly but surely, one intro class at a time, you built momentum, and a life-long love of education was born. You dedicated your nights and weekends to your studies and were ultimately accepted into Pharmacy school at the University of Utah. You went on to do a residency specializing in Critical Care where you have worked tirelessly for decades to increase the quality of patient care. You have always gone above and beyond the call of duty, dedicating outside hours to research and study design, to further improve patient health outcomes. In addition to your work as a practitioner, you have been a mentor and teacher to countless residents and students, all of whom you consider as friends and honorary Lonardo’s.
Fatherhood
During your interview for the Pharm-D program in 1990, my Mom went into labor with me. After abruptly leaving your interview, you met my Mom at the Holly Cross Hospital and became a Father. Two years later, you gave me my greatest gift, a little brother and best friend named Andre. For as long as I can remember, you compelled Andre and I to stick together at all costs and to face the world’s challenges as a united front. We have always lived this vision and have been inseparably close our whole lives due to your influence.
You were blessed with a second set of children, two incredible girls, born in 2002 and 2004. Your sweet daughters brought out the best in you. They made you softer, more compassionate and brought you endless joy.
You’ve always been a doting Father to all your children. You were never too busy to play with us, take us on adventures, or coach our early sports teams to 0-12 records. You taught your children to be deep thinkers. I’ll never forget you reading the American Presidents book to us each night in our bunk beds. You would help us understand each president’s legacy and the impact they had on our nation. From an early age you would pose us philosophical questions and encourage us to think critically and challenge conventional thinking. I remember you offering to pay us $1 if we could describe the meaning of song lyrics. I can still hear “Welcome to the Grand Illusion” by Styx blasting through the minivan speakers if I close my eyes.
As a recent first-time father myself, I know that the early moments of your child’s life are filled with hopes and dreams for the future. It is a new parent’s greatest hope that they successfully steward their children into Adulthood while maintaining a close relationship with their children. You have far surpassed any expectations, hopes and dreams you could have had during your early days as a Father. All of your children consider you their hero and best friend. Not only do we all love you endlessly, we more importantly like you, and can never spend enough time with you. During childhood you always told me a time would come when I’d go into “orbit” and not want to be around you or be seen around you with my friends. That day never came, not because I didn’t go into orbit but because I have always wanted to spend time with you and share you with all my friends. Many of whom, view you as an extended father themselves.
Paradoxically, the only parent I know that prides themselves on “not giving their kids any ‘effing thing” is the one who is most beloved and admired by his children.
You have set the gold standard for being a father.
Husband
You showed us all growing up what it means to be a great husband and life partner by your daily habits. We would watch you get home from a 10+ hour shift and immediately cook the family dinner, clean the kitchen and help with homework. We’d watch you leave small love notes for Lynn and carve out quality time each night. You’ve made us all better partners by your example.
Adversity
You are no stranger to adversity or hard times. Adversity has taken many shapes in your life, from poverty, to family addiction, death, divorce and now twice, a personal cancer diagnosis. While your diagnosis is undeniably scary, after a life lived for others, you can be confident that you do not face this fight alone. Remember, no messes with the Lonardo’s, and our family tribe extends beyond bloodlines into our incredible community of friends. Your tribe will be with you every step of the way.
Your toughness, zeal for life and sense of purpose can’t be factored into mortality prognostications. As Victor Frankel said, “If you have a strong enough why, you can endure any how”.
You will beat this cancer and I look forward to one hell of a remission party.
Your Life is Your Message
It would be impossible to capture your journey and impact in a single letter. The purpose of this writing is not to be a hyper-abridged biography, it is to remind you of who you are and what you have to live for. You have made such a profound impact on so many lives, yet your largest impact has yet to come. As a leader and mentor, your impact is amplified through the on-going contributions of your children, family and friends. Your legacy continues to grow and will long outlive you.
I am forever grateful that you are my Dad. You are loved and admired beyond words.
Love,
Marcus
